You Don’t Co-Own Me

When Mr. Cuomo entered the Upper West Side bar, he walked toward me and greeted me with a strong bear hug while lowering one hand to firmly grab and squeeze the cheek of my buttock.

‘I can do this now that you’re no longer my boss,’ he said.


Hi men! Life is confusing, isn’t it? My goodness, I just don’t know how any of us manage to get through the day. Here is one tip that might help: you cannot, in fact, grab your female former manager’s ass by way of saying hello just because she’s no longer your boss.

I know!!!! It seems like you should be able to do this, especially if you explain, like Chris Cuomo did, that all of her body parts are fair game now!!! It seems like the woman should think “Good point! If I can’t fire him, we basically co-own my body.”

But no. ☹️

And if you grabbed your ex-boss’s ass right before reading this and now want to apologize? Apologize to *her.* Not to her husband.